…We are not sure how to think of or describe ourselves, and it feels like a real identity crisis. It’s as if we’ve been taught to be afraid to think well of ourselves but to also regret our negative internal narrative, creating, yet another cognitive dissonance. We want to step up and out as the Lord would ask but we are truly terrified someone will see all the junk we keep hidden in our backyard.
We fear they’ll see that the pristine front yard doesn’t match the ship wrecks hidden in the back yard.
They might see the old sagging boxes of ideas that didn’t work right,
strings and strings of old burned out Christmas tree lights,
they might see the never replied to well wishing cards,
maybe just burned up ground, the grass is gone near and far.
They may see the old hope-a-lumps which moved in from the dumps,
the 3-legged hashlets,
and a line of dirty old dancing rats.
And let’s not forget the aging broken cars
which never went far,
all hidden in the backyard.
If people go into our secret spaces, we believe that somehow….somehow.. everyone will know, we are not who they thought we were.
Friends, God has another view entirely. Just because we have a different calling doesn’t mean we have a lesser calling. When we hide and build fences, it hinders our forward movement and our being able to come into the destiny God has for us. Secrets build fences, and confession builds bridges. -c