The Doldrums

There comes a time in the lifespan of any believer when there seems to be no wind, no inspiration, no motivation, we don’t know what to pray, and maybe even all purpose for praying is a vacuum of sorts. Oh bother, what to do what to do?

When i was young, more than once i was told i was too much of a dreamer. Even then i can remember thinking, “i’m supposed to not be a dreamer, but how does the future happen without a dream?” Yea, more conflicting words in my head. There was a civil war in my head between dreaming and how to live with conflicting words, like “what will people think of you?”, and, “If things aren’t moving in your life, you must be on the outs with God.” Those words were like ropes binding my feet, and i got stuck at the intersection of condemnation and freedom. It feels like having God open the prison doors but then not being able to move beyond the same open door because of all the negative leaning “what if’s”.

Everything in life nowadays seem so instant, and when we have to wait, into our heads comes the words of some well-meaning person saying, “Something is wrong. It shouldn’t take God this long to reply. Something is wrong!” Oh, and don’t you know it’s easy to glibly tell someone that the Lord will reply “in the fullness of time.” But before you get all wound up, think. How long did Abraham and Sarah wait for the arrival of their promised heir, Isaac? God first revealed to Abraham that he would be the father of many nations when he called him to leave his country and go to the land God would show him. Abraham was 75 years old. Fifteen years later, when Abraham was 90, God renewed his promise. Ten years later, at age 100, Abraham and Sarah finally had their son. That’s a total of twenty-five years before “the fullness of time.” 25years! Usually, if we have to wait 25 minutes, we start having anxiety about why “nothing” is happening. So, let me ask you my friend, Is nothing actually happening? How do you know what God is doing where you can’t see? In the book The Shack, there’s a scene where Papa is laying in a lawn chair in the sun. Mack comes by and makes a smart remark, something like, “Oh, i see even God has time to lay in the sun,” wherewith Papa squints up at him with one eye and says, “You have no idea what i’m doing.”

When i’ve gone to the Post Office and there’s a long line, it is not unusual to hear someone remark that the clerks are oh, so, slow. The anxiety of waiting triggers people to look around for someone to blame for being inconvenienced because they are having to wait. Occasionally, i have chimed in saying, “I’m in this Post Office every day, enough so, that i’ve done time studies concerning the average time each person spends at the window. i can assure anyone that it’s not the clerk who is slow, but more us who aren’t prepared.” Silence typically follows that. We seem to need to blame someone when we are inconvenienced because it doesn’t appear anything is moving along.

At the end of the book of John, Peter and the guys decided to go fishing, maybe because they couldn’t think of what else to do, so they just went back to work. After all, it appeared nothing was happening.

In Acts, how long did they wait for the coming of the Holy Spirit? Remember, Jesus had said to them, “I send the promise of my Father on you, but stay in Jerusalem until you have been clothed with power from on high.” How long did they wait for this mystery to occur? Fifty long days. Don’t you think there was a lot of debating and questioning, like, “Why do we have to wait like this?” i’d bet they thought all sorts of things. “Did we miss God?” “Did we misunderstand Jesus?” “Maybe that wasn’t really Jesus.” “i’ve got stuff to do, why am i sitting around here, waiting on the wind to blow?” In Acts 1:4 the Lord said, “Do not depart”, in other words, “Don’t depart your mission. Be still.” He knew they could easily get their shorts in knot, lose sight of their mission, and wander off like sheep which see no reason to keep standing around, reasoning within themselves that Jesus went to the Father, and it appeared nothing was happening. “I guess it’s over. Oh well. Might as well go home.”

While we’re waiting on “the fullness of time”, metaphorically feeling like we’re in the middle of the ocean with no tides, and no wind, consider to yourself: In our impatience and need for things to move in order to feel like God is doing stuff, we don’t notice the small things if we’re always in motion. Although we are often unwilling to wait on the Lord, He is wisely giving us time to take care of the “back office stuff” which often goes unresolved because we’re so occupied. We easily miss the beauty of the day, or the little endearing words of our children, a spouse or friend. In our anxiety of waiting, those types of things are SO easily missed. Maybe we should take advantage of God’s opportunities which include waiting, rather than resenting our having to be still. A few minutes, hours, or even days will not make much difference in God’s economy and deliberately slowing down allows us to get into step for what the Lord is doing next.

What do you think?

Leave a Reply